If you should be thinking of getting adopted by anyone half as gorgeous as moi then here are a few little tips you might find useful. This is a very personal list, of course.
1) We like to sleep. A lot. Preferably on big, soft, comfortable beds which protect our slim bodies (no fat on us, darling!).
2) We like toys. Lots of toys. Soft, squishy toys are my preference. I have my morning ritual of moving them, one by one, from my number two bed to my number one bed each day when I wake up. (Mum moves them in the evening so that Dad doesn’t trip over them when he gets up in the night. I, of course, don’t get up in the night; therefore Dad has to step very carefully over me when he goes night-time walkies.) I used to have quite a few Teddies but they have mysteriously disappeared after I decided to try biting the eyes out of a couple of them, and Mum caught me at it. Dad said why didn’t she just cut all the eyes out herself, but she said that was icky and slapped of mutilation, and she couldn’t bring herself to do it. So, no more Teddies for me. All of my toys now are soft and safe, with no plastic, no eyes and no other swallow- able protuberances.
3) Food. Well, I like it a lot. I’m not particularly fussy (actually I’m not fussy at all) though I’ve heard it said that some hounds are a bit more particular. I hear the words “balanced diet” a lot from my two, but to be honest, as long as I get two meals a day with something crunchy and something meaty, and lots of bones and things to chew in between, to keep my teeth nice and clean, I’m a happy boy.
4) Walks. Yes. Like ’em. Nothing too strenuous – a nice easy pace suits me and my geriatric couple just fine. Two a day keep me more than happy, thank you.
5) We like cuddles. As many as possible. Some of us go in for the lean when we are being cuddled. I personally can achieve a 45 degree angle provided my human doesn’t move during the process. My private aim is to train my humans to cuddle me for at least an hour at a time so that I can actually go to sleep standing up.
6) Water. (Not the drinking kind, which we all love.) Water … the falling-from-the-sky or splashy kind. Some of us like it, some of us don’t. I personally like to paddle in the shallows when we go to the beach in the evenings, and I don’t mind being taken out in light drizzle (as long as I’m wearing my raincoat, of course). But yesterday afternoon my Mum put on her raincoat, then she put on mine; she clipped on my lead and we went down the steps into the garage. When she got me to the garage door….. well. What was she thinking? The rain was hammering down. I wasn’t too impressed, I can tell you. I stood in the doorway and looked out at it. Then I looked back at her. I gave her that hard stare, as if to say, Are. You. Out. Of. Your. Tiny. Human. Mind? I mean, really! She can’t seriously have imagined I’d actually set foot outside in that? It was back to bed for me, and some quality sleep for an hour until the rain stopped. Then I took her to the beach. Humans, eh? They have the strangest ideas. You’ve gotta love ’em.